


Can I Get a Wahoo?

by Walosi



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Love Poems, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-26
Updated: 2019-06-26
Packaged: 2020-05-19 23:06:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19365583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Walosi/pseuds/Walosi
Summary: An AU in which Aziraphale has lived in a fully human context, reincarnating every so many years and both of them struggling to maintain.  They apparently have seen their Universe's version of 'Good Omens.'  David Tennant and Michael Sheen apparently exist and have thriving acting careers in this AU, as well. Good for them!  Happyish ending.Also I'm absolutely terrified of posting this.  Absolutely. Terrified.





	Can I Get a Wahoo?

**Author's Note:**

> Crowley is referred to as a Great Fox a bit. He is STILL a serpent. (In my head, he's a shapeshifter, original form unknown, snake was for the sake of the Job in Eden, maybe Fox for another, who knows?!) Foxes around the world are tricksters, and in some cultures associated with Christian ideas of devils, demons, etc. Trickster fits most with how TV Crowley seems to be, and seems to align with Book Crowley also, so I use it as a familiar to me folklore element.
> 
> The odd idea that a supernatural being might fragment parts of themselves into more than one human body is present in this story. It's ok to be confused.

Right now  
I feel like some pawn  
in a game You’re playing

“You capitalized ‘you’re’.  
There is no power differential,  
Beloved. Not between US,  
not ever.”

So you say.  
But your fragmentary  
human selves are  
huddled around a woman  
who only needs  
ONE

and that One,  
refuses to awaken 

I need only one.  
And I don’t even need that to be all the time.

And all I get are distant  
voices  
I suspect are mere  
hallucinations  
lies  
to get me to  
GO TO THE DARK SIDE

and then you throw  
your Inspirations at me

and I feel exposed

you know how private  
I actually am

and there we are on a  
SCREEN again

HUGE in 50 countries!

Even worse,  
if you’re going to show  
us to the worlds,  
could you BOTHER  
getting ANYTHING RIGHT  
at least once?

Please?  
My dearest . . .  
I knew the moment  
you’d chosen David to portray you.

You ALWAYS choose David.  
I must admit, Michael plays me  
infinitely better than I play me.

My joy has died this lifetime.

Watching him play the Angel  
to your Demon  
brought up strong memories

The whole crepes thing.  
I really do need to learn to cook.  
And garden.  
And get it all done properly

I miss you so. Your face,  
your voice.  
Great Fox who Walks the Stars,  
you are ever my only dream

“You must defeat the  
learned helplessness,  
Protector of my Soul,  
Ruler of my Heart,  
Holder of my Balance.

And you can. 

Practice,  
application,  
DO THE THINGS  
YOU LONG TO DO,  
my Angel.

Do them BADLY.

Your antiquarian books  
were destroyed by the Hateful Ones.  
This is so.

Your dreams,  
at every turn,  
dissassembled and mocked  
by those who ought to have  
encouraged them,  
taken joy in your  
enjoyment of existing;

curious!  
Empowered!

My Soul,  
my soul.

My only Light,  
YOU are the one who  
ever strikes fear into those  
who say of me

He is nothing,  
low class,  
crass garbage,  
nothing but a liar,  
a WILD FOX,  
not a proper kami’s familiar . . .  
not an angel . . .  
just refuse scrubbed off  
from the Beautiful Places  
unfit to exist. . .

I’ve seen you destroy  
whole planets  
over this.

And so I stand,  
staunch  
and I WILL NEVER  
STOP

Bringing our histories  
into your heart

again  
and again  
and again

for until your heart smiles  
and says,  
~yes, delight!  
Yes, Alpha Centauri!  
Yes, the Great Star Nursuries only you recall!  
Anywhere!~

when I say I’ll give you a lift . . .

until that time,  
I will never give up  
on you.

And after that time,  
I will never give up on you.

And even now, before that time  
I AM NEVER GIVING UP ON YOU

If showing up embodied,  
my Treasure,  
made any difference -  
I’d be there.”

But it DOES.

“You did not say my Name  
in the bookshop.

You did not believe your  
knowledge to be true.

Even though I behaved as  
only ever I do, with you.

Treating my mother in law  
well. Like she mattered.

But you did not say, ‘my love.’

You said you belonged to someone.”

Yes, you dolt!  
I belong to YOU and  
I couldn’t tell if that was YOU  
embodied or an imposter seeking  
to cause a rift  
between us by  
inspiring behavior.

“hm. I had not thought of that.”

Anyone might say they were yourself.  
Anyone can behave in ways I find appealing.

I haven’t been in a room with you  
EMBODIED  
since 1992.

I barely recall your frequency . . .  
Though I always recall your scent . . .

“My own,  
I’m sorry.  
I did not understand  
your frustration.”

I don’t expect you to,  
Fox Boi.

You never had to  
fully BE human. There is  
much you do not  
easily understand.

It’s not your fault.

I never should have taken this route.  
Only OUR SIDE  
really matters.

I got distracted by the humans.  
So troubled.  
So needy.  
So demanding.

And soon,  
I feel I will die and never embody here again.

When that happens,  
Please.

Take me with you.  
Wherever you want to go.  
No one gets my attention any more  
but yourself.

“! WAHOOO !”


End file.
